I know, I know...I'm way too smart to buy into the idea that there is such a thing as supermom or that I should aspire to be one. Still the temptation is there to do the most activities, dress your kids in the cutest clothes, have the most original art projects. It's much like the temptation to in high school to be the prettiest and coolest with the cutest boyfriend, even though there's a tiny voice in the back of your head reminding you that's not who you really are. Sometimes, I'll admit my desire to be supermom.
Then my back goes out.
I can brag all day about how healthy my family is. We rarely get sick, my kids enjoy a very healthy diet, I drag the kids to the exercise class with me three times a week. But there are two realities I can't escape....I'm fat and I have a bad back (which according to my chiro are not really related).
Over the weekend at the lake I aspired to be supermom. Because Jeremy was drugged up (following oral surgery) I drove the whole way and unloaded our suitcases up the stairs. I also tossed the kids around, bouncing them on my shoulders and playing soccer in the yard. I went swimming and had to jump off the boat and help drag the pontoon into the dock after it stalled (while Jeremy tried to keep the engine from flooding), then ended my days sleeping on a 30 year old mattress.
And the next day I couldn't walk.
How can I be this decrepit? I see moms all the time rolling around with their kids and squatting down to their eye level. Since my back injury in April, I very rarely even get down on the floor to play with the kids.
So I must question...if I can't squat down, if I can't play on the floor and stop a boat with my bare hands, can I be super mom?
Probably yes. I mean definitely yes. There's no perfect way to do this parenting thing, this I know. And God never calls anyone to be perfect, not once.
I just have to learn to accept my reality, or at least as it is for the moment. My chiro was a little irked with my behavior after all the good work we've done and I can't blame him. I'll never heal if I keep injuring myself.
And now to go hang upside down and contemplate parenthood.
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1 comment:
Love this post, especially the sentence about high school. I never tried to be the prettiest or have the cutest boyfriend, I just tried to get out of there in one piece! I always felt like I wasn't really myself during that time, but I didn't even know who I really was until I got older.
Even now that I know myself better, I still have times where I feel not enough-not thin enough, not "Martha" enough, etc. Your sentence "God never calls anyone to be perfect" is a great thing to remember! Hope your back feels better! So glad I can keep up with you on your blog!
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