Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mom Enough

Well I thought it was time I weigh in with an opinion here. I know you all want to hear my awesome opinion right? Right?

Unless you were living under a rock, you probably know that this was the cover of this week's time magazine.

(I must add that I do apparently live under a rock because I didn't know there was an election this week. My bad. But I know all about this boobie-gate)

It's sparked alot of controversy and here's what I have to say....

-- First off, people who think nursing BABIES in public is gross are akward are ignorant people.

-- I a personally not offended by extended breastfeeding (nursing past the age of 2). It wouldn't gross me out to see it done, but I'm sure that it would some people. People who choose EXBF (like what I did there?), probably experience some strange looks and mostly choose to do it only at home.

-- They probably do not do it with the kid standing on a chair while wearing a sexy outfit. That element of the picture kinda rubbed me the wrong way. Like they are trying to make it look sexy. Which is strange and creepy and just...not appropriate. BF-ing is and act of feeding someone. Why this kid who looks to be Tessa's age isn't drinking out of a big gulp is between the Mom and the family. Nurse, don't nurse, nurse forever, I don't care. Can't we all just get along? But let's keep it real. Nursing an older kid in sexualized fashion is wrong for everybody.

-- I nursed both kids exclusively until about 14 months and wasn't ready to wean either time. Once I weaned because of pregnancy, the other time because of a week long trip to Alaska. If those things hadn't stopped me, who knows how long I may have nursed. I loved it, they loved it. Nursing is a blessing.

-- The article is about Attachment Parenting which is super trendy right now. I guess we fall somewhat into that category since we nursed, did natural birth and are mildly crunchy. The only aspect of AP that I could never get behind was co-sleeping. I like my bed. The kids like their bed and that seems like the way it should be. So we did do sleep training...which I believe is an AP no no. We are also pretty strict discipline-wise and I'm not sure how that lines up with AP principles either.

-- The big rub here is the headline "Are You Mom Enough" and the idea that attached parenting is some feat of super-mommy strength that all women should aspire to. In my opinion, it's simply a lifestyle choice that may NOT be for everyone. Some women can't breastfeed or don't want to. Some people like me can't stand to have little people in their bed. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses and parenting is no different.

-- Everyone has choices to make in this parenting journey and I think that this cover and headline are just adding fuel to the fire of women feeling guilty and inferior. Are we Mom enough? To do what...nurse a 2nd grader while looking fabulous and sexy? I guess not.

I've thought about this and I'm hoping that the Time article was intended to be tongue in cheek....poking a little fun at the extremist and poking a little fun at the entire idea of 'mommy wars'. Because in the end if we are all making the best decisions for our kids and loving them the best we can, then we are indeed MOM ENOUGH.

1 comment:

OneBigTallGirl said...

Amen! (sorry I'm late to this one. I didn't see it before.) :)